House is getting better and better every day. And tonight, a new episode of House MD aired. This one called House Divided. Here is a post filled with spoilers.

Complete Recap and Spoilers of House MD 5×22 – House Divided

A deaf wrestler prepares to compete at a high school meet. His mom cheers for him in a “deaf pride” t-shirt. The match (meet? game?) begins. Midway through, the deaf wrestler grabs his ears as if he’s hearing a loud high pitched whine. He screams.

House sleeps. A woman’s voice wakes him up. It’s Dead Amber. (Seriously, is this Grey’s Anatomy?) She’s a hallucination, she says. He says it’s insomnia. She thinks maybe his guilt over Kutner’s suicide is reminding him of his guilt over her.

His pager beeps.

At the hospital, Thirteen presents the case of Seth, a deaf 14-year-old who started hearing imaginary explosions. He went deaf at age four. Dead Amber weighs in on the differential. She shoots down House’s seizure suggestion. She can’t believe he’s ignoring his own subconscious.

House walks in on Wilson and Cameron. He wants sleeping pills. They’re discussing a case, Wilson says as he closes the file. Dead Amber stands over his shoulder, surprised that Wilson gave him the scrip without argument. House gets their file. Cameron asked Wilson to plan Chase’s bachelor party. House volunteers his services.

As they try to get Seth to seize with flashing lights, Thirteen and Foreman argue over the culture of deafness. His mom interprets his signing, he says he can’t see.

House needs a moment and goes into an empty exam room, where Dead Amber helps with the diagnosis, something he didn’t think of. She suggests playing the kid some music. Another long shot, she says.

Foreman, the kid and his mom perform a procedure as House interrupts with a boom box, some Kanye shades and a booming rendition of Public Enemy’s “Fight the Power.” He puts the boom box on the kid’s chest. He can feel the vibrations in his abdomen, but not his hands. A new symptom.

The kid signs with his deaf friend and House taps on the glass. “It’s just like the zoo,” he says. Foreman asks how he knew about the numbness and House answers with a riddle. Then Dead Amber presents another one, as she tells him to think “wrestling record” while holding bowling pins.

House rejects Foreman’s suggestion, but reconsiders when Dead Amber tells him he’s right. Now they’re thinking cancer.

House asks Thirteen and Foreman if they’re busy. Cut to them at a strip club. Thirteen puts money in the stripper’s undies. They enjoy the strippers equally.

Back at the hospital, Taub explains to Seth about the cancer they think he has. He wants them to treat the cancer, but leave him deaf. Taub tells him it doesn’t work like that.

The team looks at Seth’s MRI. House tells Thirteen she can’t go to the bachelor party, but she tells him if she gets drunk enough, she might make out with a stripper. She’s in.

Dead Amber suggests getting an old MRI of the kid from when he broke his nose three years ago, for comparison.

House interrupts Wilson as he tells Chase not to go to his own bachelor party. Wilson sees on the MRI that something changed in the kid’s head. They’d need to do a brain biopsy to confirm. Just what House wanted to hear.

Wilson tells House he’s not going to the party. House says OK, Dead Amber disagrees.

In surgery, Chase finds that something is wrong, but it’s not cancer.

Dead Amber and House scheme and House tells Chase to go ahead and put in a cochlear implant. He says Seth’s mom OK’d it. Chase resists, but caves.

The kid wakes up with his un-asked for implant. The sounds overwhelm him. He can hear everything.

Cuddy meets with his mom and House. The mom says she’s angry, but as Dead Amber points out, but she’s sitting, not seeming very angry.

House calls her on it. But she says she wants it out.

Cuddy asks him why he did it. On behalf of all the other gimps out there, he says, he didn’t want to allow him to opt for a handicap. Cuddy puts Foreman in charge of the case.

House puts in a blue tooth so he can not seem crazy as he discusses things with Dead Amber.

The patient has a fever now. Dead Amber eats candy, trying to remember the name of Wilson’s stripper, the one House is trying to foist on Chase.

House visits Wilson, wondering why he’s not in his face about the forced cochlear implant. Wilson says what House did was nice, a caring act – which he did in an immoral and illegal way.

Wilson says House can’t make him go to the bachelor party. House knows.

Seth signs with his mom. She gets exasperated and says his name. He likes the sound of it.

Taub drops by and Seth wets the bed (apparently Taub has that affect on people).

House lays out ice cream for the team, flavors for the bachelor party. It’s flash-frozen booze. Dead Amber pops up and reminds House about a guy he visited once treated who peed liters. Similar circumstances. House decides it’s Seth’s heart.

House meets with Dead Amber, a little freaked out that everyone else faded away when they were talking. Chase strides down the hall. He wants to talk about the bachelor party. Chase is not angry about the implant since he shouldn’t have let House talk him into it. He says Cameron isn’t going to like the bachelor party and since he intends to spend the rest of his life with her, he needs House to kidnap him. Done. Dead Amber remembers the stripper’s name, Karamel (with a “k).

Seth signs with his friend, who has decided she wants an implant, too.

House pounds energy drinks as Foreman, Taub and Thirteen say the kid’s heart is fine. House says his arrhythmia is hiding. Foreman says no.

House convenes with Dead Amber, trying to figure out how to stress Seth without the test. She suggests asthma meds, which will force his heart to beat faster, which will reveal the arrhythmia.

They hear screams from Seth’s room. He ripped out his implant. He’s bleeding from his head, but his heart is also beating irregularly. Arrhythmia proved.

Foreman admits House was right, but that doesn’t explain everything else. Dead Amber holds up a lighter.

House pours shots in the morgue. He lights one, then quickly knocks it over, then they’re all up in flames, as is the cadaver on the tray nearby. Dead Amber muses what a wrestling match, strobe lights, etc. have in common. The flaming dead guy solves it for House: heat. Which means it’s MS.

He calls Foreman and tells him to start treatment.

Foreman tells Cameron and Chase that it worked as they leave the hospital. Two very good looking cops stop Chase, saying they’re with immigration. Cameron can’t come. “Illegals only.”

She doesn’t buy it. She tells Foreman not to let House get him in too much trouble.

House lights shots at the bar – not incinerating any dead people this time. As House lays out the ground rules, Wilson hesitantly opens the door. And then we notices where the “strip club” is. It’s Wilson’s apartment. His furniture is out back.

A woman calls his name. He recognizes Karamel, and then does a body shot off her later. Followed by Thirteen. Wilson can’t believe Foreman’s OK with it. Shoot, he paid $50 for it.

House heads to the bathroom and drinks booze alone in the tub, talking to Dead Amber. They toast their success.

Foreman drags Chase over for one more shot. Meet Karamel. He licks her tummy but recognizes the taste. Strawberry. He keels over.

Through the door, Foreman tells House what happened, that one of the residents had an epi pen and they took him to the hospital. House realizes that’s why he/Dead Amber wanted Karamel and her strawberry body butter at the party. He wonders why he’d want Chase dead.

He gets a call. Seth is dying. They were wrong.

The now-drunk team goes to the hospital. Seth’s lung failure rules out MS. Cuddy realizes they’re all drunk.

House goes home, trying to shake Dead Amber. He’s upset she/he tried to kill Chase. Cuddy calls.

Dead Amber tries to help and he says the opposite of what she says. He says he needs to sleep. Foreman picks up on the diagnosis and Thirteen says House ruled it out because one of the symptoms is that he’d be hoarse…which they wouldn’t notice in a deaf kid.

They take out his breathing tube. Foreman looks in his mouth. His teeth are nicotine-stained. He chewed tobacco to cut weight for wrestling. Taub was right (about something complicated they said a while ago). It’s treatable.

House visits Cuddy, wanting sleeping pills. Wilson isn’t answering his phone. Probably because he was found by the police wandering pantless – from his own home.

House tells Cuddy he hasn’t slept through the night since Kutner killed himself. She gives him the scrip.

Seth’s mom tells him she’s going to tell the doctors to put his implant back in.

House sleeps. He wakes up, looking around for Dead Amber. Nothing so far. He starts to relax. But then he turns around and she’s there.

Author: MollyWillow for IMDB