Father-Quote-4-phil-dunphy-modern-familyIn this week´s episode of Modern Family, Manny and Luke have to organize a Yard Sale to raise money for UNICEF for their Social Studies class and the whole family has to chip in and put stuff at disposition to be sold. If you haven´t watched the episode, I´m sure you can by now imagine it was again hilarious. Plot is at a Pritchett family yard sale held by Jay and Gloria to help a fund-raiser at Luke and Manny’s school, Phil can’t decide what to buy or sell, and Mitchell and Cameron assess Alex’s new male friend, but Gloria would rather the contents of an old trunk not be revealed.

And so, I am now highlighting the best quotes and moments from Modern Family´s Garage Yard Sale episode same way I compiled all Phil Dunphy´s Philsosophy advices to Haley.

Best Quotes from Modern Family S04E06 Garage Yard Sale Episode

mom-quotes-2-claire-dunphy-modern-familyManny Delgado: Jay, should I get rid of this?
Jay Pritchett: The hat, the jacket or the cane? Actually yes, just yes.

Manny: We are doing a yard sale for our Social Studies class in order to raise money for UNICEF. The point is for us to learn about GLobal Altruism
Luke Dunphy: No, the point is for us to raise more money than Ms Cooper´s class so we get pizza and a pool party.
Manny: Your cinicism makes me sad for the world.
Luke: Ease up Delgado, I´ve seen you with a pizza.

Jay: I hate garage sales. A bunch of shady character going through my stuff. Why can´t a write a check?
Gloria: Relax, Jay it´s just a couple of people in the driveway.
Jay: Yeah, that´s where it starts, then it´s just a local call… can I use your bathroom?… my mother needs to lay down. It just stinks

Claire: Oh honey, give it up. Eve John Mayer doesn´t have a John Mayer poster anymore.
Haley: It´s signed by him.
Claire: It´s time you know, they come that way
Haley: But it says “To Haley”
Claire: In a different color. Your dad wrote that
Haley: Ew, he wrote your body is a wonderland.
Claire: I didn´t catch that til after.

Claire: You finally found something less cool than those pants that zip off into shorts.

Gloria: It´s going back in the attic, and I want no more questions.
Manny: Why?
Gloria: That´s a question.

Jay: I never thought of you as a motorcycle kind of guy.
Phil: I would be if Claire ever let me have one.
Claire: You can have a motorcycle if you want
Phil: Haha, Can I also have an affair with my super hot receptionist?
Claire: What super hot receptionist?
Phil: Don´t change the subject
Claire: You don´t have to buy a motorcycle if you don´t want one, but don´t blame it on me. I´m fine with it.

Phil Dunphy: I´m terrified of motorcycles, but sometimes you have to do things to show the world you are still a man.

Claire: I have the opposite of credibility with Alex… I am her mother

Gloria: I won… imagine this when I was eighteen

Gloria: You are wrong, whoever you are.

Alex: Mom, You didn´t have to bring your big gay guns to back you up. No offense.
Mitchell: Non taken.
Cam: I kinda like it.

Customer: What´s your return policy on this?
Jay: You return, I call the police

Claire: What happened?
Phil: It´s a long story, check your Inbox

Uncle Grumpy: I saw Basic Instincts at the movie.
Gloria: Oh, what did you think?
Uncle Grumpy: Basicly it Stinks

Hay: It´s like a Home Invasion, the only difference it´s in a Home Invasion I can shoot people.

Claire: Oh my God, she married her puppet

What do you think about the Garage Yard Sale quotes from Modern Family? Let me know. Also, follow me on Twitter for more Modern Family Quotes. Or Pin the pictures to your boards.