Tag Archives: Shit My Dad Says

$#*! My Dad Says Best Quotes and One Liners S01E17 Lock and Load

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$#*! My Dad Says S01E17 – Lock and Load aired this week

Anyday of William Shatner on TV is simply a must watch. Even if it is in the form of a yet subpar sitcom as $#*! My Dad Says.
The show gets great one liners, and a huge William Shatner, but for now, that´s mostly about it. Cast surely could do much better because it has the chops. Perhaps that´s why I´m harsh to the show, I expect much more from it because I know it can deliver.

In this one, With a burglar on the loose in their neighborhood, Ed wants to use his prized gun for protection, but Rosemary shoots down the idea. Also, Vince and Bonnie look for some extra help during their trip to a fertility clinic.

Best Quotes and Oneliners from $#*! My Dad Says S01E17 Lock and Load

Ed: I have an alarm. Your room is next to the front door. I hear your girly scream and I´m up

Bonnie: In order to get pregnant we are going to try something new
Ed: The bouncing cowboy!

Ed: Speaking of excited tonight I´m going to make love to Rosemary

Rosemary: I just don´t believe in guns
Ed: That´s ridiculous! It´s right here, you can touch it
Rosemary: I know they exist

Ed: Do you even own a nighty?

Bonnie: Well, guns are dangerous
Ed: Not if you know how to use it. Every guy has a penis, not every girl has orgasms

Bonnie: Ed, do you wanna be right, or you wanna get laid?
Ed: That´s right, I´ve never been both

Vince: That´s rather ambitious, do I have to fill the whole thing?
Nurse: I hope not, that´s my ice coffee

Bonnie: That was fast even for you

Vince: Who do we know is available all day and know a lot of porn?
Henry: Go for the H dog

Rosemary: so you are basically saying that you got robbed because I´m not a slut?
Ed: Nnnnnyes

Rosemary: I´m not a slut and I don´t like guns
Ed: Then we have nothing in common

Ed: Guns don´t kill pornos, people kill pornos

What do you think about $#*! My Dad Says Quotes? What about the show? What about William Shatner as Ed?

Let me know in the comments section.

Also, remember to follow me on Twitter for more $#*! My Dad Says Quotes.

$#*! My Dad Says Best Quotes and One Liners S01E15 Ed Goes to Court

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shit-my-dad-says-best-quotes-one-liners-ed-goes-to-court$#*! My Dad Says S01E15 – Ed Goes To Court aired this week

Anyday of William Shatner on TV is simply a must watch. Even if it is in the form of a yet subpar sitcom as $#*! My Dad Says.
The show gets great one liners, and a huge William Shatner, but for now, that´s mostly about it. Cast surely could do much better because it has the chops. Perhaps that´s why I´m harsh to the show, I expect much more from it because I know it can deliver.

In this one, Ed wants to put the brakes on his pursuit of Rosemary after she says she would like to be romanced. Also, Vince and Henry have a “‘Stache-Off” to see who can grow a mustache faster.

Best Quotes and Oneliners from $#*! My Dad Says S01E15 Ed Goes to Court

Ed: God, What the hell happened to Paula Abdul. She looks terrible.
Henry: Dad, that´s Steven Tyler
Ed: Oh he looks good

Ed: Oh my God, what happened to Oprah? She looks terrible
Bonnie: That´s Randy Jackson
Ed: Oh he looks good

Henry: I bet I can grow a more killer mustache than you
Vince: Care to make it interesting?
Ed: Please, someone make it interesting

Henry: Holy Super Mario

Henry: Dad, we need you to judge us
Ed: Ok, you are both disappointments

Ed: We are neighbors, so there´s a little walk of shame home

Ed: You are a woman, right?
Bonnie: Well, if I´m not I´m wasting a lot of money in the gynecologist

Ed: I just want someone to be the Irving to my Ting Ting

Bonnie: If she did like you for who you are, would you trust her judgement?
Ed: You make a valid point

What do you think about $#*! My Dad Says Quotes? What about the show? What about William Shatner as Ed?

Let me know in the comments section.

Also, remember to follow me on Twitter for more $#*! My Dad Says Quotes.

$#*! My Dad Says Best Quotes and One Liners

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shit-my-dad-says-best-quotes-one-liners$#*! My Dad Says S01E13 – The Better Father aired this week

Anyday of William Shatner on TV is simply a must watch. Even if it is in the form of a yet subpar sitcom as $#*! My Dad Says.
The show gets great one liners, and a huge William Shatner, but for now, that´s mostly about it. Cast surely could do much better because it has the chops. Perhaps that´s why I´m harsh to the show, I expect much more from it because I know it can deliver.

In this one, when Bonnie and Vince learn that their first wedding wasn’t legal, they plan a new ceremony, but Ed wants to break-up with them when he finds out that Bonnie’s father is coming.

Best Quotes and Oneliners from $#*! My Dad Says S01E13 The Better Father

Ed: Paper is like a woman. If you are gonna share it, be sure you go first

Bonnie: I´m gonna give you 80 dollars. Surprise me.
Ed: Last time I said that I woke up naked in a wheelbarrel

Ed: There are two kinds of people you don´t trust. Anyone who doesn´t tell you what they do for a living, and those people who wear umbrella hats

Ed: You are dumber than you look. And you look very dumb

Terry: Haven´t you ever made a mistake?
Ed: Yes. Two- They are both upstairs

Vince: I Yo-yo Henry. Skinny bitches like you wouldn´t understand

Ed: That check will bounce, like the groom´s boobs

Terry: If I take those 500 and turned them into 5000 I´ll be able to make up for being a gamble addict

Vince: I look like a sausage getting married

Ed: Holy Cow, the sky is falling

What do you think about $#*! My Dad Says Quotes? What about the show? What about William Shatner as Ed?

Let me know in the comments section.

Also, remember to follow me on Twitter for more $#*! My Dad Says Quotes.

Best Quotes of the Week – November First Week

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This week we are starting this thing about Best Quotes of the Week, and as usual, Ty Burrell´s Phil Dunphy is in the list.

We already did a post on the Best Quotes from Phil Dunphy in Modern Family´s season one. And last weeks Halloween quote from Phil Dunphy.

As a result of Let´s say, Barney Stinson´s quotes, Gregory House´s quotes, Cal Lightman´s quotes, and many more, is that we will try to introduce this sort of Hall of Fame for Quotes, and have the best Quotes of the week, in a weekly fashion.

So here,

This week´s Best Quotes on TV Shows

The Big Bang Theory Best Quote of the Week:

Eliza Dushku´s Agent Paige: This is my FBI ID.

Sheldon Cooper: This is my Justice League ID, but that doesn´t prove I know Batman.

S#*! My Dad Says Best Quotes of the Week:

Bonnie: What the hell is wrong with you?
Ed: I´m making a sandwich! You didn´t feed me. I´m hungry.

Henry: Now if you excuse me, I´m going to go cry in the shower.

30 Rock Best Quotes of the Week:

Jack Donaghy: Ambition is the willingness to kill the things you love and eat them to stay alive.

Jack Donaghy: Tracy, do you ever Google yourself?

Tracy Jordan: Sure, I Google myself, like when Angie is not in the mood, or I´m alone in an hotel.

JD: Tracy, you do know that Googling is looking yourself up in the Internet.

TJ: I didn´t know that. That explains why Liz Lemmon was so cool the other day.
(Flashback) Hey Liz Lemmon, do you mind if I Google Myself in your office?

Liz Lemmon: Sure Tracy.

TJ: Can I use your computer?

LL: How else are you gonna do it?

Jack Donaghy: Shoulders back Lemmon, you are not welcoming people to Frankenstein´s castle.

Grey´s Anatomy Best Quote of the Week:

Mark Sloan: As a friend I gotta tell you. You sound awful lot like someone who´s getting double D´s just cos her girlfriend likes a big rack. And by big rack I mean Africa.

The Apprentice Best Quote of the Week:

Donald Trump: Are you having an affair with Stuart?

Brandy: No sir,

DT: Would you like to?

B: No sir. I like older men, sir.

DT: That was a very smart answer.

Donald Trump Jr: You are hired!

Private Practice Best Quote of the Week:

Well, here it was all the episode. A can´t miss episode of Private Practice with Charlotte King rape aftermath, and a couple of scenes going right to the “For Your Consideration” tapes of KaDee Strickland and Paul Adelstein to say the least.

So, which was your favourite quote of the week for november´s first week? Let me know in the comments section.